6 Ways to Hit Reset on Anxiety
- Neha Kalpatri
- Mar 4, 2025
- 6 min read
Anxiety can feel like death. I get it! I totally do. The rambling through thoughts to shake that feeling, the breathlessness and the feeling of being utterly helpless. That unbearable crippling feeling? I understand. The time slowing down only makes it feel like it’ll be an eternity before that feeling passes. Like everything in the world is moving at a regular pace, except you, stuck, unable to catch a breath, something so simple, something one’s body does involuntarily. How can I help anyone when I can’t even help myself in what feels like a life-or-death situation? If you relate to this, I do too.
I am here to tell you; that you are not alone. I have had many incidents when time just stopped and pain was all I felt. What in that moment felt like the end, somehow, thankfully wasn’t the end. Even during anxiety, you know this isn’t the end yet it doesn’t make it any easier. Like your body and brain have suddenly become possessed by something and left you with zero control. The harder you try to gain back control; your mind plays a reverse card making you lose more control which only f**ks with your brain further and makes everything a messier mess.
Let’s start by first understanding what anxiety is and the various forms it can take. Some symptoms of anxiety you might want to look out for are rapid breathing, sweating, pounding heartbeat, shaking, hands/feet trembling, muscle tension, feeling the lack of control over your body, freezing, difficulty breathing, cold sweaty hands/feet, tingly feeling in your palms/feet, dry mouth, numbness, nausea etc. Anxiety can take many forms and may present differently for different people. Some examples of experiencing anxiety include, but are not limited to, anxiety attacks, panic attacks, excessive worrying, phobias, selective mutism, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), or disorders like social anxiety, separation anxiety etc.
It was bad for me, especially in the beginning when I was able to recognize the feeling but the intensity of those were a different ball game- something I had never experienced before. Getting through one day to the next felt dreadful, I will say that. However, over a period of time, every now and then, I managed to conquer the anxiety I experienced. I wouldn’t say I have since been able to conquer all of my anxiety, that is far too unrealistic, but a few, every now and then I have had a better grasp on. It’s a game of what works and what doesn’t. There’s no guaranteed solution which only makes it more frustrating to deal with. It takes time and practice to train your mind to acknowledge and let it happen. You aren’t surrendering to it, but you are also not making it worse by panicking. You go into “trial and error” mode, trying the various ways until one of them helps you conquer your anxiety.
I am sharing with you 5 grounding techniques that helped me through anxiety and still continue to do so to this day. These are techniques I have tried after reading about it and some that I came up with in my desperate attempt at making things better for myself. There were hundreds of trials and errors I did to see what worked best for me. After all these years, I think I am able to narrow it down to these 5 main techniques to instantly ground myself when I am super anxious. This is your sign to get professional help if your anxiety is bad and is only getting worse over time. I know it feels impossible; I know the difficulty, I know it seems like there’s no cure. But if you are still here reading this, believe me, it’s not the end. You have a long way to go, so much unfinished business. You and me - we’ve got this! Just reach out and get you the help you need.
5-4-3-2-1 technique – engaging all your senses:
5 things you can see – it could be a laptop, a bird, a key, a door, a wall, a colour, a switch, a light, a curtain anything you can see near you.
4 things you can touch – it could be your skin, your hair, a blanket, a cushion, your bedspread, your fingers, anything you can touch. Try focusing on its texture as you touch them.
3 things you can hear – could be a passing car, a honk, a glass, a fan, a ticking clock, your voice, a notification, anything you can hear.
2 things you can smell – it could be fresh sheets, an incense stick, could be soil, rain, yourself, the detergent on your clothes, your pillow, a book anything that you are able to smell.
1 thing you can taste – it could be your saliva, it could be water, a chocolate, or something you were eating just before, toothpaste, if you truly can’t find anything you can taste, try focusing on the way your tongue feels – against the roof of your mouth, on your lips, on the inside of your cheeks.
Breathing exercises – there are quite a few techniques under this category.
Deep breathing – Take deep inhales through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Repeat for 5-10 times. (Although, I have had tough luck with this.)
Use your palms – while doing the deep breathing exercise above, run your thumb in an upward direction against your index finger as you inhale and inward direction while exhaling. Combining two senses together has worked better for me in the past.
4-7-8 seconds – Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 and exhale for 8 seconds. (I've found this to be really effective.)
Nostril breathing – This is familiar to those who practice yoga. Cover one nostril with your finger to inhale from the other, then switch fingers to exhale.
Lion’s breath – breathing in and out through your mouth, another technique from yoga. Concentrate on exhaling through your mouth, you can do this with a noise (whatever comes naturally in that moment for you). This also helps calm your nervous system almost instantly.
Square breathing – Inhale, hold, exhale and hold again for 4 counts each.
The power of smell – Smell therapy (if that is a thing) does wonders for me. When my anxiety was at its worst, I kept at least three different scents within 2-5 meters of me at all times. When I felt anxious, I would simply pick one right at the very beginning and it would instantly ground me. If scent #1 didn’t work, I would slowly move to scent #2 without rushing so I have completely exhaled scent #1 allowing scent #2 to (hopefully) work its charm. I have a detailed article on smell therapy that I will link to this post for you to read.
Mindful observation – As the name suggests, it is mindfully observing something; and it’s often recommended to observe your own body. Personally, this scared me more than bringing me relief, especially with the pounding heartbeat and breathlessness. Instead, what worked for me was observing something outside my body and narrating it in my head, or out loud (whatever felt possible at that moment), or sometimes even describing it to a friend on a phone call. If you’d like to try scanning your body, start from your head and move down to your toe, observing how every single body part of yours is feeling, do you notice any sensations? For example, does your hand feel warm, do your feet feel cold etc. It's a technique where you scan your own body to send signals to your brain that you are not in danger which triggers anxiety.
Hot and Cold – the hot and cold technique involves exposing yourself to either of the temperatures as you are comfortable. For example, this one time I was struggling through an anxiety attack after I received some bad news, with every microsecond I could sense it only getting worse. The door was a second away from me so I rushed outside into the open in –16 degrees without a jacket. The sudden temperature change instantly calmed me down until I could process the news and return inside. This was an extremely reckless way of doing it and I advise you against it. However, shocking your body in regard to temperatures helps ground oneself. For people who don’t live in cold places, you could always try sticking your head in the freezer section for a couple of seconds, until you regain control. Running your hands through cold water or a cold shower helps too. Shocking your body can instantly ground you and make you aware of your surroundings allowing you to regain control over yourself.
All the above techniques are mindful practices that help with calming one's nervous system and gradually helping regain control over your body. Even if you start to feel better midway, it’s always recommended you complete the full exercise. If one technique doesn’t work after you have completed it, try again. If that feels frustrating at the moment, move on to another exercise that seems possible and revisit a previously tried technique. Again, this comes with a lot of practice, but don’t lose hope. YOU'VE GOT THIS! <3
March 2025
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